I was in a shop last week. I spend a lot of time and money there. The owner has become a dear friend. When she’s free, we sit and chat over coffee.
When I arrived, the shop was filled with foreign customers. To my delight, two of them are women I have worked closely with and deeply respect for their kindness to me and for their work on behalf of the community. Since one of the women had never been in the store before, I introduced her to my friend, the shop owner. Instead of graciousness, or feigning minimum politeness, the new foreign customer nodded and rudely turned her back on my friend. I was horrified and saddened by her behavior.
A week later, a similar thing happened to me. I was taking a course and sat down next to a woman who, it turns out had a beautiful, welcoming smile for everyone but me. As fast as a jackrabbit, she got up and left the class. When she returned, she moved to another seat. I was baffled and taken aback. I began to feel both angry and embarrassed, but thankfully remembered that whatever problem she had with me, it was hers to heal. Not mine.
I saw that I could remain hurt and angry, or do something positive to change the energy of the situation. So, I focused my energy on her back and consciously surrounded myself with symbolic mirrors of protection. (The mirrors allow only love to penetrate or flow from beneath them). I sent her love and silently told her that I was no threat to her.
She ignored me for the balance of the class, but when it was over, she went out of her way to grace me with her luminous smile and then stopped to chat for a few moments. I was delighted. She’s a dynamite woman with much to offer who needed to know that it was safe to do so.
Both situations remind me that how others act towards us is usually about them, not us. When we take a moment to give others a chance, to step beyond “status” or their fear, we have the opportunity to share love and acceptance that will be passed on to everyone we meet that day.
Copyright©2008 by Jeanne M. Eck. All rights reserved. For permission to duplicate this article, kindly contact the author via her website at: www.Iamhappiertoknowyou.com. While you’re there, be sure to check out information about her award-winning book I Am Happier to Know You.
